Tag: poetry

dangling leaves

Wind through the trees
Blows leaves that flutter
In their last attachment to life

The buds of Spring
And green Summer
Give way to orange
And brown
Of life moving on

Leaves are like illusions
Or lives blown by truth;
They last through time
Until contradictions
Or wisdom
Blow them away

The flutter is caused by
The stem clinging to its source
In a gale force

The sputter and flutter and denial
Both stated and internal
Of any person resisting
Acknowledging the truth
Is like those stems
Destined to separate

In the depths of winter
There may be a few leaves
Still dangling
Old beliefs die hard
And illusions linger
After long and bitter truth
Blows down upon the disillusioned

The blue sky of reality
Cold and stark
Is laid bare
By the winds of truth

Until a new Spring
<><><><><><><><><><><> 12/09/12

October 6, 2014
Light on a redwood tree

Find a place to stop and sit while light and orbit shift
To here and there, or there and here, or where we are to be

Light on redwood bark of a thousand year old tree
Hues of brown and sienna and sepia and coffee

At a point part way down bright glare makes light white and scattered
Masking clear vision of strands of bark as if the tree were tattered

Each strand of life perhaps a soft light of recollection
Lives passed as lives passed, hallowed in loving connection

Images or stories reverberate in time
Spectrum of our lives entwined

Intermittent shadows dark, in time our minds may ease
Like bright memories become diffused histories

Movement of the planet around the sun
Marking time or marking us, each one

Light so bright now gone away
And tomorrow will be another day

Trees do not spend a thousand years in shadow
Despite rain or fog, bright sun will not be laid low

Light so bright deep in a heart
Where to end and where to start

Find a place to stop and sit while light and orbit shift
To here and there, or there and here, or where we are to be

<><><<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> 09/17/14

September 27, 2014
who owns the sky

when the wind swirls and around mountaintops curls
no one knows how patterns grow as the wind will always flow
down ravines air careens
pushed or pulled in patterns full
of meaning for those who wonder
who owns the sky

the sky is seen across time or dreams as limitless open space
meaning derived or arrived by happenstance in each place
by effects of interminable wind, blowing up or down again
half way down or half way up never clearly seen
except askew by the few who can see in between
sometimes seen as gates of heaven
moving life forward mystically like leaven
who owns the sky

the wind like breathe of God comes down
shaping space, then clouds, then ground
moisture gathered up above
comes down as snow or rain like love
to bring life’s beginnings or push us on
every night then every dawn
each day or evening like the ones before
buffeted in movement or in lore
though each day uniquely given
events or legacy somehow driven
blowing, swirling, whirling spaces
shaping or renewing faces
of land, or rock, even mountains moved
by wind and sky until it is proved
who owns the sky.

August 23, 2014
To rise and fall in living it all

On July 2, 2010, our son Christopher, broke his back in a bicycle accident. On July 2, 2014 my cousin commented on happenstance and chance. This is what ensued.

Whole lives built out of the most fragile of happenstance.
That so little matters so much, and so much matters so little.
Is it grace or blessing or curse?

You know, God does what God wants to anyway. +

Kindness goes unrecognized.
Cruelty goes unpunished.
Distraction changes a life.
The inconsequential becomes too large
because someone thought about it too long.

Hold onto the inner strength when the outer strength is buffeted.
Rely on the outer forces when the inner strength wanes.

Four years ago the curse of horrific injury,
And the blessing of lack of permanence rained down on us.
A broken back described as “some scrapes” by our protective friend.
Eleven days in the intensive care of modern health care.
Not knowing.
Only praying.
With little confidence, and all the confidence.
No choices mattered anyway until it was all done.

Every day it is something.
Some chance encounter.
Some instantaneous happenstance can change everything, or nothing.

In our darkest hour there’s still a light shining down inside.*

The power of denial moves us forward
Until the realization bursts forth
It is denial
Reality is more present and real
And
We do not control it.
We only control our response to it.

Pull back the curtain my fears have drawn +

Whole lives built out of the most fragile of happenstance.
That so little matters so much, and so much matters so little.
Is it grace or blessing or curse?
Whole lives built out of the most fragile of happenstance.
That so little matters so much, and so much matters so little.

“What’s really crazy is how easy it is to get them confused and, how,
in an instant, you can also know the difference.”

*Zoe Muth
+Iris Dement
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> 07/02/14

The moon glow unused
for affairs of the sole heart
shining reminder
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> 07/06/14

You are a legend among the poor travelers
These who are the most basic of gatherers
Bus tickets and boots pass through your hands
Helping each other as we travel these lands
Heartaches and travails pinch on the heart
Stories and past glories each played a part
Travelers arrive asking help after miles
Hoping to sustain hope despite all their trials
Each went down a path as directed or deflected
Care and kindness must be perfected
By you the legend among travelers
Aligned with the simplest of gatherers
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> 07/21/14

There were no visions in dreams
Hopes hazy after so many schemes
No haunted or hallowed ground
Elusive answers yet to be found
Time passes beyond how long tears lasted
Now and then somehow contrasted
Memories burst forth unexpectedly
When lyrics touch a nerve introspectively
As particular songs find heartache
Stark realization of no second take
Hands still do their work to transform
Listening to the world still informs
Singing still bursts forth
But my love is not there, so what is it worth?
I know I will find it as I search o’er the earth
The heritage of all humans who went through their birth
Day by day
To rise and fall in living it all
To rise and fall in living it all
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> 07/25/14

August 3, 2014
Summer Solstice – gratitude and grace

For I am certain of this: neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nothing already in existence and nothing still to come, nor any power nor heights, nor depths, not any created thing whatever will be able to come between us and the love of God. Romans 8:39
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> 06/21/14

Lord, make me an instrument of Your peace.
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
where there is sadness, joy.

O, Divine Master,
grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;
to be understood as to understand;
to be loved as to love;
For it is in giving that we receive;
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
it is in dying that we are born again to eternal life.
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> 06/21/14

Our mountain
Our choice
More mountains
More choices
Gifts of love and understanding
Flowing down like rivers

The hint of a breeze,
The breathe of the Creator
Blowing across our lives
As the rivers were flowing o’er our rapids

We languished in the calm pools
Of joy and contentment
Brought by the wonders of our children
In them we shared the excitement
of growing and becoming

They traveled our mountains with us
Their discoveries flowed
Together with ours
In this river of life

Waiting for a sign
That such goodness and acceptance of life
Still flows in these mountains
And brings the water of our lives
Inspiration forevermore

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> 06/21/14

Oh, life
Oh, death
Overwhelmed with quiet courage.
You showed us.
You gave us quiet courage.
Struggles through time.
You gave us more than we know
In sharing all that was within you.
Hold our hearts
As we hold you
In the place we reserve
For our love that is true.
Each of us
In a different way
Have gratitude
Which we can barely say.
Know this now,
In this place,
We know that ultimately
What we got from you
Is grace.
We love you now
As we always did.
Love doesn’t leave us,
As you had to.
For evermore you stay within us
Giving us grace
Only you can bring us.

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> 06/21/14

Here you are. Here I am.
Wind
Sky
Trees
Mountains
Rocks
Meadow
Here you move
As the wind will move you.
Here you shine
As the sunlight glows.
Your spirit glows
And the wind arises
Spirit soft
Spirit strong

Here I am.
The happiest person I know
Awaiting inside me.
Waiting, but not waiting, for the
Wind
Sky
Trees
Mountains
Rocks
Meadow

Here you move. Here I am.
You in me,
And I in you.
The pages of this book
Are blown
Flipping forward
As if to move on
Moving forward
With you
And without you

I drink a toast to you
You’ve made your mark.
Tears can’t obscure
What I know I’ve lost
What I know I have gained
Gratitude and grace fill my heart
And move my soul
As you do.
In this meadow where you chose to be
The wind rises
The Creator responds
With the reminder of spirit movement
All through the universe

The sun blazes
Warming boulders
To hold the depth of spirit movement
In the ancient stone
On this single spot
In the universe

The grasses ripple in the wind
Transient movement
Of transient things
Like life, not love.
Flowers blooming like star clusters
In distant edges of this universe

Sky will change
And earth will move
Seeds will blow
And the earth will turn,
Not love
Incomprehensible
In being beyond all these things

Ants will walk
Birds will fly
Hawks will soar on distant winds
Babies born will discover this,
The incomprehensible,
Not knowing yet that distant stars
Also form
In this universe
Of
Being.

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> 06/22/14

I want the warmth of this boulder
To stay in me
I want the sound of this wind to resonate in my dreams
I want our love to glow forever more
I want to move forward.
I want the depth of devotion to never leave me.
I want this thing that we shared,
This love,
This connection,
This devotion,
I want it.
I love it.
I know it makes me better than I might have been.
And you too.
In a thousand years this is where I will be.
Here and now.
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> 06/22/14

I toast all our dreams
We lived them here completely
Just by being here
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> 06/22/14

June 25, 2014
The day my parents named me

This poem is the third in a group, one which followed the poem-in-the-mind-of-the-creator, and now this.

The line from At Home with the Homeless was “Can people see the truth as my parents did the day they named me?” It inspired this one. Both references though are to the people I work with. I learn their names and hear the beauty and the tradition that must have been theirs, and their parents on that day. I often wonder about how things were for them then.

I had a great friend, Gary Kerr, who was one of the very best CPS social workers I ever met. In CPS work we often dealt with conflicts between adolescents and their parents which were somewhat intractable. Gary used to re-frame the issues by asking the parents to recall that day, when the child was so small, when they gave them their name. He asked the parents to recall their hopes and dreams from that time; and bring it into the solutions for the conflict. So a bit of this sentiment is influencing this too, now 20 years after I learned this way to help parents.

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>
On the beautiful glorious day my parents named me
They only looked forward and believed my future was bright.
Anticipation exploded into celebration.

Becoming, in each day, someone who would come to be
Less, then more, then less, living happenstance of passing night.
And each change brought in the experience of temptation.

Somehow changed and formed in unexpected trajectory.
For the times I struggled and succeeded and did what was right
If someone noticed, then sometimes cheers and acclamation.

At other times, through life’s din, I ended up on my knees;
Bent, broken, spitting out the dirt and cursing at my plight.
Burdened down hopelessly by stagnation or starvation.

I can’t help recall on the day my parents brought me here
All was well and complete, if they kissed me and held me tight.
Just this simple thing was a magnificent sensation.

Family providing encouragement and hope, not fear;
Made my young life whole, like glimmering in potential light.
All that could be was powerful, full of fascination.

Did they know of the awful forces that brought on the tear?
How daily grind, or setbacks, find the weaknesses so slight
All the hope and joy shaken, each day a trepidation.

Thus arriving here, staggering regretfully my fate did veer
To struggles large or small, that could sap any fragile might,
Given over to delusions brought by deprivation.

Can the lessons learned let me into better future peer?
And truth derived or wisdom burned into my soul each night
Become what my parents named me to be, thus into my salvation?
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> 05/24/14/

May 24, 2014
My first poem about baseball and beer

Barley and hops and water
Melded, stirred, procured
A bit of flavor for one to savor
Watching the ball fly to the base
Before some guy puts it into space
Run across the field with a bound
Make it stop before it hits the ground
Toast those guys, give em’ a slap on the back
Before that bat gives another crack
All fueled by barley and hops and water

April 6, 2014
At home with the homeless

“There is such a level of unspeakable contempt from the haves in society bestowing shame in the homeless. Homelessness stirs up fear: frightens and saddens us at the same time. Judgments are as harsh as the plight itself. Homelessness conjures up thoughts of isolation. Call it what it is: injustice, racism and a harsh reality. Often the most vulnerable suffer the most, including children, teens, single mothers, elderly and the ill.”
Response by a friend

“May we never get used to the poverty and decay around us.
A Christian must act.”
Pope Francis @Pontifex 04/03/14

<> <> <>

In the evening of April 3, 2014 I spent some time with Homeless Action! colleagues Adrienne Lauby, Jen Parr, Karen Martin and Adam Kirshenbaum. They inspired me, and confirmed that this is a noble effort worth pursuing. I went home and this is the poem which ensued.

These are my people.
Not in any sense that I lead them,
Or they belong to me.
These are the people I belong with.
These are the people I align with.

I find their lives and their experiences
To be compelling and important.
I find their value as human beings
On a par with the Pope and me;
To be of equal value, of equal worth, and of equal dignity.
I am no better than they are,
And they are no better than me.

There’s a famous prayer attributed to St. Francis.
The prayer was actually submitted anonymously.
Does that mean that a homeless God might have submitted it?

Make me an instrument of Your peace,
To be among those who need some peace.

If there is hatred, and sadness, and regret
As I sit on a cold doorstep,
Where can I sow love?

If I have done injury
And have injured those I love the most
Where is there pardon?
The truth of my life, lived in the bushes
Is the error.
Can people see the truth
As my parents did the day they named me?

I have so many doubts.
I have so little faith.
Where is faith and hope?
It is here, in me.
If I could only see.

In my despair,
The hope
Is in the intrinsic value of me
Where I rest in darkness,
And cold,
And damp clothes
That make me shiver.
Is there faith in awaiting the light?
Are there leaders
And people who pull the levers of power
Who can act on my despair
To give me some light?

And in the depths of sadness,
From where I am now,
Yes, I know joy.
In the kindness of strangers
Who may not know
They have saved my life,
My hope,
My faith in humanity’s inherent goodness

O Divine Master,
Grant that I may not so much seek
To be consoled as to console.
On the streets
I am at one with my homeless brethren

To be understood as to understand;
I understand my sisters’ plight.

To be loved as to love.
I love without words in the grace of each moment.

For it is in giving that we receive.
As giving from the heart and the meager means
Is the true gift.

It is in pardoning that we are pardoned.
As I hope to be pardoned by all those to whom
My mental illness
And use of altering substances
Or ordinary human frustrations
Have caused me to offend.

Even as I too have been offended
And then have pardoned,
Because that is the thing to do.

And it is in dying
That we are born to eternal life.
It is not the dying in physical death.
It is the dying of selfishness and self centeredness.
That is the death we should desire

This is where I belong;
Among those without a residence.
To bring the realization
That first, and foremost,
And always,
A just society gives a roof
And warmth
And a daily resting place to each person
No matter what.

April 4, 2014
Miracles ever

Miracles ever
God does what he wants anyway
Praying for the best

[acknowledgement to Iris Dement]
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> 03/14/14

Perfect harmony
Weight of a cat on a lap
Contentment right now

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> 03/22/14

March 28, 2014
Brings the deity

Blessings can be derived
from pain.
But that does not mean
the experiences of pain
caused the blessings.
Without the pain,
the blessings
and understandings
may have been different.

Although prayers to a deity
may be specific
And they may be followed
by an action or event
It is not to say the prayers
caused the deity
to give a response of action.

God’s existence,
and our dependence
on His benevolence,
Does not mean
He acts in lives
as we imagine.

How has it been shown
that the desire for our own,
or our loved ones’, well being
Brings the deity
to attend to us?

The force of goodness
and creation
which we think of
as God
Is either an enormous ego
which requires us
To believe
all glory and honor to Thee,
Oh mighty One,

or,

On the other hand,
The Creator
may have made creation
to be a good in
and of itself
To evolve
and grow
and die
through mighty natural forces.

If there is human will
and power
Then the power is subject to the rules
of nature the Creator set in motion,

Or not.

If we think
we are not subject
to the rules of nature
Then nature ultimately
comes around
exhibiting our folly.

If the Creator created nature,
and Man in it,
to glorify the Creator’s
Own being
Then there must be
some purpose
which impels Man
and all creatures
To impact on their own destiny
in the realm of nature
the Creator created.

With this comes
decisions and free will,
The will we may have
is manifest in how
we choose to respond
to each circumstance

Or not.

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> 03/12/14

March 12, 2014